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Asserting yourself is a direct way of expressing your feelings and needs clearly, politely and without hurting the other person's or party’s feelings or minimizing what you want to say.
To help you assert yourself to people who are your superiors such as your boss, parents, secular or religious leaders and all those in authority over you, remember the following assertiveness ASSERT mnemonic:
A Assess your problems, feelings, goals, right, needs and wants
S Set a convenient time and place to meet
S State the problem clearly
E
R
T
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A perfect example of how to assert yourself to your superiors is found in the book of Joshua where we can see Caleb Jephunneh asserting himself to Joshua who was his superior since God had chosen him to lead the Israelites after Moses had died. We can also see that Caleb followed the following assertiveness ASSERT steps:
A Assess your problems, feelings, goals, right, needs and wants
Caleb assessed his situation and felt that he had a right to own Mount Hebron because it had been promised to him.
S Set a convenient time and place to meet
Caleb approached Joshua in a place called Gilgal. (Joshua 14:6)
S State the problem clearly
Caleb said to Joshua, “45 years have passed since God spoke the word to Moses that I should be given Mount Hebron and it is still not in my possession as the Anaks live there.” (Joshua 14:10)
E
Caleb said to Joshua, “Today, I am 85 years old and yet I feel as strong today as I was 45 years ago when I was promised Mount Hebron and therefore, I am ready to fight for it.” (Joshua 14:10-11)
R
Caleb said to Joshua, “Give me this mountain (Joshua 14:12) and the permission to fight for it and possess it.”
T
Caleb said to Joshua, “Please remember what God said to Moses regarding you and I 45 years ago when Moses sent us and 10 other men from Kadesh Barnea to spy out this land that God had promised us because Moses said that the land where I set my foot would be my inheritance since I had wholly followed the Lord my God and brought back a good report of the Promised Land”. (Joshua 14:6-9)
As a result of asserting himself effectively, Joshua gave Caleb Mount Hebron (Joshua 14:13) and gave him permission to fight for it and possess it from the Anaks even though 45 years had passed from the time he had been promised that mountain. Therefore, following this simple ASSERT mnemonic and you will be able to assert yourself successfully to your superiors.
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